Archive for July, 2016

Installment 104

July 20 through July 28, 2016



It’s July again and the 7th Anniversary of your Ascension has come and gone in celebrations around the globe. Hundreds of your children gathered at Forest Lawn and Neverland Valley Ranch to honor you and bear witness to your continuing impact in their lives. Floral displays representing countries around the world decorated your final resting place; the One Rose for Michael group lined Holly Terrace with over 10,000 beautiful, long-stemmed, red Freedom roses. They gathered in Munich and Russia, China and Japan in small and large groups to honor your life among us.

For myself, I had a little quieter personal celebration with my customary month-long prayer/meditation vigil, culminating in Major Love Prayer on the 25th.  I spent the month first drawing a rough draft of the vision I was granted during my visit to Los Angeles in January 2012 on an 11 x 14 sheet of paper; then redrawing it on a larger sheet to get the composition balanced; and then painting that vision on a 24” X 30” canvas. I worked on it a little bit every day for the first two-thirds of the month of June until it was finished.

The night of July 7 (the 7th Anniversary of the night we took our spiritual relationship out of “standby mode,” as you so aptly put it in one of our earlier Conversations) was a particularly difficult and emotionally draining evening. Reliving that heartbreaking night seven years ago is not an easy thing to do, yet at the same time, I am so very grateful that it was not the end of the story.

Nevertheless, I made it through and I am still here. Are you?

Now, what kind of question is that? You know the answer to that question before you even ask it. Of course, I’m still here. Where else would I be?

Well, you feel a little more distant.

That doesn’t mean that I am further away; it just means that you are resisting my presence more because of your ‘heartbreak’ over what is and what cannot be changed. It means you just need to stretch a little further to reach me by removing your resistance so that you can recognize my touch upon your heart … and you have been doing that.

You have begun a new practice on a regular basis; you have consistently practiced it for the last couple of months; and I am impressed. Will you tell me about it?

Yes, my love, of course … and consistent is the operative word in that statement. I have always had the best of intentions regarding resolutions to practice new things; it is always sticking with it that has been a problem.

That’s why I’m impressed. [Michael giggles.]

To be totally honest here, I have actually begun to take your advice, which I probably should have taken when I first retired. I have begun to start every day with a brief inspirational reading and meditation accompanied by gentle, meditative music designed to enhance the meditation experience.

Previously, I had awoken in the morning and just jumped into a project without any real preparation and often felt a little scattered.

Yes, preparation is a key element in whatever you do. If you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail. It is also one you try to bypass regularly. I’m not criticizing you; it’s a mere statement of fact. You want to ‘jump in,’ cold.

However, you are finding that preparing in your art is absolutely necessary. You prepared to paint your painting mentioned at the beginning of this Conversation. You drew it, you redrew it, and you redrew it again. That included three different sizes of drawing, composing, and preparing the canvas before beginning the finished painting.

It’s the same with life. Preparing to start your day is just as important. It sets the tone; it tunes the instrument through which you hear the Symphony.

It’s that patience thing again. You have this idea in your mind that a true artist just slaps paint or whatever medium he works in onto a piece of paper and an incredibly insightful image just seems to appear by magic.

[Michael snorts loudly.] That is not how art happens. A true artist prepares, and prepares, and prepares until it looks like magic, which is not the same thing at all. It requires thought, patience, preparation, practice, perseverance. It is 90 percent perspiration and 10 percent inspiration, as Thomas Edison so rightly said.

I know, Michael. I think that patience is my life lesson for this lifetime. In addition, if I become absorbed in whatever project I am attempting, I end up missing my meditation because the time just seems to slip away; and when I’m drawing or painting you, total absorption is a given.

As a result of consistently awaking and structuring my day with an inspirational reading and meditation before I dive into the day’s activity, I find that I am much more calm and at peace and more able to remain unflustered by little annoyances that may crop up. I’m able to remain unattached and less invested in distressing external situations and circumstances happening out there in the world, and I am able to stay a bit more positive regardless of the day’s events.

Good! That’s what we’re after. It’s all about staying in the Love Dimension on a full-time basis because that is the ultimate reality at the heart of all creation. We aren’t there, yet; but we are moving in the right direction.

We are stretching your belief structure a little more every day. Taking the time to breathe calmly in this eternal moment of NOW; to be grateful for all your blessings and to appreciate all the beauty that surrounds you; to enter the sacred space bordered by love and to stretch those boundaries by projecting that love into your surroundings and into the events and circumstances that you find distressing is so important. It gives you a solid foundation from which to re-imagine your world.

Well, all I can say is that it certainly needs it. This world appears to be headed to hell in a hand basket, Michael. The last couple of months have been quite challenging out there in the real world.

Okay, my first thought in response to that statement is:


Everything else is only an illusion … make believe that you have been made to believe. It’s not real! It’s not TRUTH!

You have been made to believe that you are separate from God. It is not true. How can you be separate from that which you are?

You have been made to believe that you are separate from each other. It is not true. How can you be separate from that which you are? We are all one in the body of the Ultimate Source.

You have been made to believe that you are separate from the beautiful planet from which you were born, upon which you depend for your survival, and which sustains your life as it sustains its own. It is not true. How can you be separate from that which you are? We are all cells in the body of Planet Earth, which is a cell in the body of the Ultimate Source of all creation.

Like the physical manifestation of the one lonely, little note on the page, which cannot be separated from the tone or vibration of which it is an expression, you cannot be separated from that part of you which dwells in the LOVE DIMENSION with me always. [Reference: Volume 1, Installment 40 – August 28 through September 3, 2011]

When one cell in your body goes rogue and starts attacking other cells in your body, it is called disease … it is called insanity. You are living in a diseased, insane world that thinks that one individual cell can attack other individual cells without harming itself. You have been made to believe this; but it is not true.

Just like in a human body when the disease has taken over and has reached a point of imbalance, the entire organism must suffer dissolution … or death. It is rapidly approaching that point in the body of this planet of which each of you is a cell and which includes all of the life on the planet.

To avert disaster, you must awaken to the REAL TRUTH that underlies what you have been made to believe. That is: LOVE IS THE ONLY REALITY. Anything that does not reflect LOVE is not real. It is not TRUTH. It is just something that you have been made to believe.

So what’s up?

Well, my dear, there have been more killings of young men of color and very recently five police officers in Dallas have been killed in retaliation. The one bright spot is that your music has been used very publicly after several of these shootings as a healing and unifying agent, as it was in Baltimore.

However, I can’t help but believe that these killings are being fueled by the bombastic, separatist, divisive rhetoric being given 24/7 air time because of the Presidential campaign, which is hotting up as we approach Election Day. One of the candidates is just pumping fear into the “us and them” mentality with every word that explodes from his mouth. Now, in addition to Latinos, Muslims, African-Americans, and women, he has added anyone who hails from a country which has been the site of a terrorist attack to the list of people he would ban from immigration into the United States.  Somehow, being the victim of a terrorist attack makes that country and its inhabitants suspect.

Currently, that would include British, French, German, Israeli and the list is growing. Shoot, we would have to include Americans since we were victims of terrorist attack in 2001! Sometimes I wonder if the man even listens to his own speeches.

What’s worse, some people are just eating his words up because, according to them, he is “speaking his mind,” which they respect. What mind? That is self-righteous, arrogant, ignorance!

Many are responding with violence at his rallies and speeches … and out in the country by extension. He is using the “divide and conquer” bait and switch very effectively and few seem to be noticing and calling it what it is: Nazism in 21st Century America. We fought a war over this a few decades ago. Doesn’t anyone remember? Now, it’s  right here … right now … on our own shores … dressed up in a bad suit and interesting hair piece.

It is the same kind of separatist rhetoric that was used against you for half of your life and it just makes my blood boil. It’s the bully-in-the-schoolyard mentality played out in the national political arena which attacks anything not like “us,” makes it other, and dehumanizes it … so that we don’t have to feel guilty for killing it.

Yes, in our comparison earlier, it’s like one blue cell in our body attacking a red cell in our body just because it’s red and not blue. And, to take the comparison a step further, bullying the red cell to join it and both red and blue attack the white cell because there is strength in numbers. What kind of sense does that make?

Man of war
Don’t go to war no more
Why don’t you
Why don’t you study peace
Man of war
Don’t go to war no more
Study peace
Cuz peace is what we need

So, how has your morning practice affected your feeling about these incidents?

Well, I am a little more able to stay … uh detached … not apathetic … more like I fail to own them, I think. With the help of my morning readings and meditations, I have been able to stay in the Love Dimension, at least so far; but it has been a challenge. I have been able to include the victims of the violence and their families as well as those who have committed the violence in my prayers and meditations for a more peaceful, less violent world.

Then, last week there was another terrorist attack in Nice, France, and hundreds gathered to sing ‘Heal the World,’ once again bringing your healing messages to bear against the violence. I added those victims, their families, and the terrorists to my prayers and meditations, appealing to their higher Selves to open all of us to more wisdom and compassion.


Good! It’s important to remember to extend love and compassion even to those who commit such atrocities because all hatred is just love that has been wounded or feels abandoned. It’s so obvious from the perspective of spirit although it may not be easy to see from the human perspective, particularly when you are bombarded relentlessly with the ego and fear-based perspective in the media.

Fear, violence, sarcasm which degrades others, the constant pressure to believe that you are incomplete and inferior creations who need this or that product to be beautiful, healthy, and happy … that is the ego’s diet. It’s drama, endless drama; the ego thrives on drama; it feeds on it and gets stronger.

It’s constant and never-ending, all-pervasive … and totally untrue. You don’t need the latest pill to alleviate toe-nail fungus or the latest formula to control wrinkles to be beautiful.

You are already beautiful and your body is a miracle of repair and renewal. Yet, the constant exposure to advertising designed specifically to make you feel bad about yourself and the violence and bad news in the media designed specifically to make you feel helpless and hopeless about your world and fearful  of your neighbor keeps you in a constant state of fear and turmoil.

Well, as clearly stated in earlier Conversations, I am not a subscriber to the 24 hour news cycle and I don’t really pay much attention to television offerings on any kind of regular basis. If I watch television for an hour a day, it’s an unusual day. I would rather read, draw, write, and lately I’ve been making little video clips from some of your poems and reflections in Dancing the Dream. I do enjoy that.

It is a good thing to avoid some of the blandishments provided by the media, but you can’t avoid it all. Your society is saturated with it. It’s important to remember that fear and love cannot occupy the same space at the same time; they are antithetical. And you can’t project peace and unity into your world if it doesn’t already reside in your heart. If your heart is in a state of conflict and turmoil, anger and vengeance, you are not coming from a firm grounding in love.

You cannot control what others do; you can only control your response to what others do. That is your choice … and your power.  Resistance to what has already happened is an exercise in futility and causes more anxiety, stress, and turmoil.

By choosing to stay immersed in the Love Dimension with me, instead of embroiled in all the anxiety and stress-inducing conflict that vies for your attention, there is no room for fear. Your new practice of re-structuring your day by beginning it with inspirational readings and meditations sets your intention for the day and helps you sustain your presence in peace. Besides, I love it when you read to me. Thank you.

We’ve talked a lot about intention. Adding this early morning practice to your afternoon power naps strengthens our connection and makes it easier for us to inspire each other. Remember, I want you to read that word as “in-spirit.”

Yes, Beloved, I remember. Wait a minute! “Inspire each other?” I know you inspire me; that goes without saying. How could I ever … in a million years … hope to inspire you?

[Michael laughs.] Of course, you inspire me every day. When you struggle with a wording that just doesn’t want to express what you are feeling, your determination to get it right inspires me.

When you draw a drawing and it doesn’t come out the way you want it to, what do you usually do?

Sometimes, I let it sit for a while and come back to it later; sometimes I just start over from scratch. Sometimes, I think about yelling at you for being elusive, but I never really do that.

[Michael laughs.] Elusive, huh? How can I be elusive?

Exactly, you are practicing learning patience and that inspires me; you are persevering in your attempt to get the image you want to recreate and that inspires me.

The drawing you are working on now, how any times did you redraw it before you were satisfied with it?

Three or four, I think, but it is a challenging drawing … and I’m still not totally, over-the-top satisfied with it; the upward tilt to the face is giving me fits! It is now in its fifth incarnation, but it’s getting closer to what I want. And I did get pretty frustrated with the first two. They were both drawn on one sheet of paper (why waste paper, right?) and I tore that sheet up. I don’t think I’ve ever done that before.

You are allowed a little frustration occasionally. Just don’t make a habit of it.

And what do you think is the difference from its first incarnation to its fifth incarnation?

Well, in this latest attempt I drew guidelines to help me get the edge of the face at the right tilt and all of the features spaced and properly aligned.

In other words, preparation, right? We’re getting there!

Contrary to what you apparently believe, this is not a one-way street, here, woman! Every time you attempt something new, you inspire me; every time you try doing things in a way that you haven’t tried before, you inspire me. When you prepare the drawing, compose it, align it before beginning, you inspire me because I know that you are practicing patience and I find that inspiring.

We are all meant to inspire each other. We are all teachers and pupils. We learn from each other and we push each other toward greater and greater achievement. That is our purpose. That is our joy.

But back to our discussion; I sense that there is something that you want to discuss.

Yes, my dear one, my new morning practice has been very effective in helping me stay on an even keel. I feel much more peaceful and able to maintain a more tranquil, prayerful mindset, at least until some new situation comes along and drags me out of that balanced equilibrium.

I assume that means that some new situation has come along which has dragged you out of that equilibrium?

It does, indeed, Michael.

Would you feel better if you talked to me about it?

Yes, please, Baby … I think I would, if you don’t mind.

Of course, I don’t mind.

I don’t know how new the situation is; I suppose I should have expected something like this to happen, but I was shocked to discover this past week that Conrad Murray has written and is about to release a book. The book is entitled “This Is It: The Secret Life of Conrad Murray and Michael Jackson.” [Notice he put HIS name first! What arrogance!]

Now, for this man to write a book of any kind, exploiting the name of the man whose life he took and was convicted of taking, is just preposterous; but to use the title of your stillborn concert tour just adds insult to injury. I would think there would be intellectual property violations galore just in the title alone.

There is no “secret life of Conrad Murray and Michael Jackson.” The man only came into your life during the last four to six months of it, for heaven’s sake, and I can’t help but think that if he hadn’t, you would still be here.

I AM still here.

Thank God … and you, Beloved.

I understand, however, that he is “telling all” about all the tabloid trash that has been circulating for twenty-five years of your life as if he was there and a member of your “inner circle,” your “confidante” for the entire time. I assume he is saying that he was told all of this stuff by you, which I cannot fathom at all. I know that didn’t happen.

Needless to say, I will not be buying his book. Furthermore, I am trying very hard not to read any discussion of it because it makes me sick to my stomach just to contemplate him profiting from his self-protecting and promoting actions that resulted in your Ascension seven years ago.

He was proven during his trial to be a pathological liar. He lied to everyone: police, emergency medical technicians, emergency room physicians, your own security personnel, and his lawyers.

It was proven that he was more concerned with his own welfare than his patient’s. He delayed calling 911 for over 45 minutes, a thing that any third-grader knows enough to do immediately in an emergency situation. He attempted to hide vials of medication and had your security people picking them up off the floor and putting them in bags before calling emergency services. He performed CPR haphazardly and ineffectively. How is it that a cardiologist doesn’t know how to properly resuscitate a patient who is allegedly in cardiac arrest?

He deliberately abandoned his patient to make phone calls while that patient was being intravenously injected with a drug that is patently inappropriate for use outside a hospital setting, without proper and intensive monitoring equipment, and which requires constant eyes and hands-on monitoring by attending medical personnel. To top it all off, he recorded his patient while in a state of altered consciousness. The judge hearing the case was appalled at 17 egregious violations of standard of care.

He was convicted of involuntary manslaughter and it should have been murder. His medical licenses have been suspended in this country. He served two years of the maximum four year sentence for his crimes against you; it was not nearly long enough for taking an irreplaceable life. And now he is writing a book about his self-proclaimed “secret life” with you?  I just don’t understand how it is possible for him to profit from his crime. It makes me ill. I cannot imagine any publishing company publishing a book by this man.

I am having a very strong sense of déjà vu, here. Is it just me or have we been here before? And have you included this publication in your daily prayers and meditations?

Beloved, I have tried … I really have. The problem is: I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO PRAY FOR!

I want to pray for the publication of this book to be stopped, for a cease and desist order to be slapped on its publication, perhaps due to intellectual properly violations or something; but that seems like a negative thing to pray for.

I want to pray that the media which is allowing him prime time in Australia to peddle his pack of lies will cancel their scheduled interviews with him.

I want to pray that the reality show that has invited him to appear as a “celebrity” will cancel his appearance in the UK. It is very indicative of the insanity we are living in when a convicted murderer suddenly becomes a “celebrity” and that only by exploiting the name of the man he murdered.

Yet, all of these things are only temporary solutions to a permanent problem and seem filled with anger and vengeance, which you have warned us against. So, I am at a total loss about what I should pray for.

Yes, I see. Yes, anger and vengeance are not the answer. Do you remember when we began our visualization practice in preparation for the trial of Conrad Murray?

Of course, I remember, Michael. I haven’t completely lost my memory, yet.

You described your feelings very similarly back then. Would you mind putting the relevant part of our discussion back then here? [Reference: Volume 1, Installment 20 – March 19 through 26, 2011]

There, did you feel that … did you feel your body tense and your mind kind of shut down for a second or two? Did you hear the word, “A**hole!” go floating past before you caught yourself?

Yes, of course, I felt it. I try to control those judgments and follow them up with a little prayer, but it is usually too late.

I know … that’s what we’re going to be talking about and why we’re going to be talking about it … that’s why I said you were going to rebel and would need some patience.

You harbor a lot of conflicting feelings regarding this issue … and I don’t blame you for that. I am not judging you … please understand that. It doesn’t matter if it’s right or wrong for you to react that way … what matters is that it is there … and it is hurting you by blocking your achievement of the ‘expanded consciousness’ that you have chosen to experience … and we need to fix it. Right or wrong is a judgment that doesn’t enter into the equation, at all.

What you just felt is the release of stress chemicals that just the mention of the subject evoked … just the words … just the thought … caused a very real physical reaction in your body. And that physical reaction … those stress chemicals … feed more thoughts of anger and resentment and a desire for vengeance … which feeds that release of stress chemicals … which feeds the anger and resentment … and on … and on … and on. It’s a vicious circle that has no breaking point … except at the source … where it all began. In your thought!

That’s why we are going to be talking about the thought process which is creating the conflict and investigating if it helps or hinders you in attaining the higher consciousness we’ve been examining in these conversations.

It seems that you still harbor a lot of conflicting feelings about this issue. From your little rant above, would you agree that is a fair statement?

Yes, I would definitely agree, my beautiful Avatar, that is a fair statement.

It feels to me that there is still a lot of ‘emotional charge’ for you in the issue of Conrad Murray. The same statements apply now as applied then. ‘It doesn’t matter if it’s right or wrong for you to react that way … what matters is that it is there … and it is hurting you by blocking your achievement of the ‘expanded consciousness’ that you have chosen to experience … and we need to fix it. Right or wrong is a judgment that doesn’t enter into the equation, at all.’

Do you remember how we dealt with this issue when we first discussed it?

Yes, my dear one, I remember. [Reference: Volume 1: Installment 25 – April 23 through 30, 2011] We swept out all the negative energies and deceitfulness in the courthouse to prepare the way for truth to enter the proceedings. We visualized all the anger, lies, violence, and resentments swept out of all the nooks and crannies and sucked out of the courthouse so that we could allow “God to enter the room.” And we left the outcome of our visualizations undefined; we prayed for the highest and greatest good of all concerned to result from the proceedings.

Exactly! The same principle applies here. You have used this technique to deal with a lot of issues that have arisen in the intervening years. It has become almost an automatic reaction to conflict in your life.

But, Michael, there is no courthouse to clean up now.


We don’t have a courthouse out of which to sweep all the negative emotions, the lies and deception and anger and resentment.

[Michael laughs.] That doesn’t matter. It’s the same principle. It’s not a physical space we are preparing for LOVE and TRUTH to enter; it is an emotional and spiritual space.

However, if you need a physical space to focus on, build one in your imagination. Give it the dimensions you choose, the location that will be the most inspiring for you.

Beloved, can I do that?

You are so funny! [Michael chuckles again.] Of course, you can do that. Whose visualization is this? Who is writing this script and directing this scene? Why wouldn’t you be able to do that?

Well, I thought I had to keep it real … kind of base it in reality like we did with the courthouse.

No, you don’t have to keep it real. There doesn’t have to be a physical space. Or, if it helps you, you can make one that you label Conrad Murray. There are no hard and fast rules.

What matters is that you surround this situation that is causing you conflict with LOVE and COMPASSION, remove your resistance to what IS so that you can allow the truth and the light to emerge from the situation. By doing this consistently, you will eventually be able to resolve your conflict and your anxiety and find forgiveness for him and for yourself.

Oh! Well, color me dense!

I lost that crayon years ago and I don’t want you feeling guilty about your confusion. It doesn’t help; it just sets you up for more confusion.

All you need to do is surround the situation with love and compassion for yourself and for him so you can release your resistance; open the channel for the removal of deceitfulness and judgment so that truth can be manifest through the situation; and open the door for “God to walk in the room.” Be the peace you want to see in the situation whatever that takes.

If you need to picture a physical space; build it. If you need to visualize a particular location or circumstance, BE there! You are writing the script and directing the action.

God, I love you, Michael.

And I love you, MOST!





Read Full Post »

This is a reading from Conversations, Volume 1, Installment 37. I have been playing around with making videos. This is my latest experiment. Enjoy!

Read Full Post »

%d bloggers like this: